Secrets to Creating a Strong Bond with Your Baby
Love At First Sight! Oh, Wait..
For nine months you’ve been walking around with a miracle in your womb. You’ve waited patiently and longed for the day when you finally get to met your child. Maybe you’ve even dreamed for years, of a baby of your own.
And when the day finally comes, that day that you’ve waited for so long, you look into your newborn baby’s eyes and you feel: absolutely nothing.
Somehow you don’t get that feeling of unconditional love. That ”I would walk through fire for you” feeling just doesn’t appear.
This was me.
A little over 4 years ago my son was born and I didn’t feel an ounce of love for him when I first saw him. It actually took me quite some time to get that feeling. Today I can say that he’s the love of my life. But it wasn’t love at first sight. And I felt so ashamed about it.
But this is actually a common problem.
Some parents feel love for their newborn baby the minute he or she is born. But for others, it can take some time.
3 Ways To Bond With Your Baby
Bonding can be an instant attachment, or it’s a relationship that’s developed over time. Parents who adopt a baby develop a bond and love the child, even though they haven’t taken care of the baby since he or she was a newborn.
Sometimes there might be an underlying medical problem that is the factor of why a parent doesn’t develop a bond to the child. If you suspect that this is the case for you, talk to your healthcare provider about it. You can, and should accept their help.
Your baby has lived inside of you for almost a year. You’ve rocked her while you were walking, fed her when you were eating, and most importantly, you kept her warm and safe.
Adapting to life outside the womb can be difficult for your baby. By continue carrying your baby, keeping her close and letting her feel your warmth, you help her get used to this new world.
Skin-to-skin contact helps regulate baby’s breathing and heart rate and reduces babies level of stress hormone and make them feel calm and safe. A baby that isn’t stressed sleeps better, which allows you to sleep better as well.
When you cuddle with your baby, holding her, and stroking her, you develop a bond and creating a relationship with your baby. This is the start of your lifelong relationship with each other.
It’s not only your baby that get’s calm from the skin-to-skin contact. It’s soothing and calming for you as well.
A study made by MCN: The American Journal of Maternal/Child Nursing, has shown that skin to skin contact with your baby minimize the risk of maternal depression.
Wearing your baby is a great way to connect with each other. You can look into your baby’s eyes while you talk or sing to her. Carrying your baby in a front baby carrier also allows you to feel your baby’s warmth and you can sniff her head to smell that sweet scent.
By using a carrier you can take care of your older kids without feeling that you’re leaving the baby alone. You can do chores and cook dinner or anything else that you need both your hands for without getting interrupted by a fuzzy baby.
A study published in the American Academy of Pediatrics showed that babies who received carrying cried 43% less than babies who wasn’t carried.Baby carrying equals happy baby! http://awesomealice.com/ojfa Klicka för att Tweeta
Look Into The Mirror
Watch yourself interact with your baby in the mirror. This might feel like a weird tip. But when you’re watching yourself be a mom, it’s easier for your brain to process the information.
Mirror therapy is a way of tricking the brain into believing phantom pains. But there’s no one saying that this kind of treatment is limited to only phantom pains.
By looking at pictures of yourself with your baby or as mention above, looking at you interact with your baby in the mirror, you can more easily get used to the idea of that you’re a mom. When you see it for yourself, it becomes more real.
Your baby doesn’t understand the reflection in the mirror just yet, but she will definitely appreciate this activity later.
Is Your Baby A Stranger?
If you’ve bonded with your baby immediately after birth, that’s great! I’m so glad for you! But if you haven’t, if you feel like your baby is a stranger, be patience. I’m sure that the unconditional love will come to you soon. Just give it some time.
If you still feel the same way in a couple of weeks, talk to your baby’s doctor and ask what kind of help you can get. You might be suffering from postpartum depression. The sooner the problem is identified, the sooner you can receive help and start developing a bond with your baby.
Let’s chat down below! What’s your best tip of how to connect with a newborn?
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